Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Home Sweet Home

I'm back from KL!!!
how was it?
FUN!FUN!FUN!
I had so much fun inthe last four days! Really! No joke!
I havent been to KL for soooo long.
Granted I went thr a few mths back, bt that doesnt count coz i was thr for less den 24 hrs n it was to get sum wedding stuffs.
I m sooooooooooooooo glad we decided to go KL in the last min.
I told u dat i need that sweet escape n i really got it!
Honestly, i've nvr tot dat i cn haf so muc fun wif dem! serious!
i tot dat it'll be n interesting trip going wif the more baik gerls,
bt! they were so muc fun, even more fun den the trip i had wif a fren in june, if i muz say!
i ges the girls were already influenced by my craziness n wat cn i say, ada yaya per!
oh god, yaya is so damn funny!
i mean i noe her for 12 yrs n she is in the cv clan! so i m very close to her n i noe how she cn be.
bt this trip definitely confirmed it. yaya pelik n lain dr yg lain lah. she is so funny n nvr fail to crack us up extremely! i havent laugh that hard n much for soooooooooooooo long!
thanks gerls!!!
bt the sad news is back to werk again tmr!
haiz!!!!!!!
i m really dreading it!
i miss all the shopping!
i will put up pictures, i think. coz i noe i always tk ter-put up pics. i try k.

it feels sooooooooo gd to noe dem better. i mean i noe dat i'm nvr really really really dat close to aliza n ashirah, bt aft this trip i tink we r so much closer. n yaya. well... i'm so happy dat we cn haf a 'heart-to-heart' talk. i mean we actually talked abt sum pretty serious adult stuffs like relationships n marriage. i mean. imagine yaya talking abt all dat! hahahhahah!

oh n one crazy thing happen in KL.
guess who i met there?

ROYDI.
yup, roydi.
dat roydi.
met roydi in kl, or more specifically, masjid india.
depan kedai selendang yg aku slalu borong.
yup, i met roydi in masjid india, depan kedai selendang, in KL.
n he's wif his family.
meaning he's wif his mum.
so, yup, i saw his mum.

how crazy cn this be again?
u noe. i've always erm... wat do u call it, imagine? fantasize? that i'll terserempak he n his mother (n moz prob his auntie) kat geylang semasa aku tgh sibuk2 cari kain n he n his mum (n moz prob his auntie) pun tgh sibuk2 cr kain. dats how i imagine it will be. dats how i seriously tot that that's how i m going to finally meet his mum for the first time.

n dats wat happened.

i juz fin buying selendang, n the moment i step out of the kedai this guy in white, pas in front of me. nt exactly in front of me bt abt 1 and a half arm's length away kinda in front of me. my first tot kenapa budak ni mcm roydi eh. 2nd tot, y m i seeing roydi. 3rd tot. god! it's roydi.

den at that same exact moment, he turn to my directionn i waved at him bt he din see me, n wen he turned away, i called out his name, pretty loud, i tink. n den he looked up. n i tink so did his whole family. i walked to him n m like, wat r u doing here. n den he's like wif my mum, abg, kakak ipar , family basicaaly n dat moment i tot i saw an old lady walked lah, so i was like, is dat ur mum, n he said yah, so i said, jap i salam first. so i walked to her n salam her n of coz did my usual, cik apa kabar cik, n den salam his i tink kakak ipar n dunno another woman, who i shall assume is his makcik n nt a stranger i dumbly salam in that shocked state of seeing him there n meeting his mum for the first time.

n den we talked a bit n said our gdbyes.

i'm still in shocked. aft dat i like haf jitters man. n den i slowly realise shit, aku ok tk? how do i look all coz his mum n aunt n his sis in law saw me too. shit shit shit.

n den i told yaya, aliza n ashirah abt him n they were all like shocked! hahahah! so funni, byk2 org, dorang yg nampak calonku. hahhahaha.

wat abt me?

hmm... i dunno. i'm scared actually. i was surprised to see him, who wldn't rite. of coz i'm hepi to see him, coz i kinda miss him. ok, i do miss him n it felt gd to see him n talk to him. bt i m kinda scared coz i dunno wat this mean n if this is a sign. i kip praying that to show me signs n i kept imagining wat it will be like to terserempak jonet kat sini, n if yes, it shows its my jodoh. n b4 i left, i dah sebulat hati nk gif dis tarik tali game up.

bt den terserempak roydi kat sana. is it a sign? my mum said, itu namanya jodoh. yaya said the same ting. sumtimes, it feels like jodoh. coz it always happens like this. everytime tgh i kata tk nk or give up lah yg tibe2 dier ada tul2 depan mata. mcm jodoh. bt i dunno. n i'm scared.
bt dat nite, i finally admit sumthing. i accept him. if he's my one, i accept him.

PHEW!

oh, today, went to tok's hse, n tok hugged me n kissed my head. i was so shocked, n den heppi! it feels great to like kinda get blessings from him. i feel like my days ahead will be smoother oready. i tink tok loves me. yeay!!!!

b4 i end lemme say sumting:

I AM GOING TO BE OFFICIALLY BE A MAK NGAH ON AUG 17 2008, INSYA ALLAH!

for all those bengap ppl, it means, my kakak is pregnant lah!
c i told u so!

yeah! ada baby in the family! yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's s true dat kalau ikut keturunan kiter, senang sangkut.
alhamdulillah..
cant wait for the arrival of baby!

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 10:01 PM

Monday, December 17, 2007

Lucky

Hady Mirza from Singapore became the Asian Idol.

The 1st Asian Idol.

He's the only Malay.

He's the only Muslim.

And he's Singaporean.

How do I feel about that?

Happy. Of coz. Kinda.

I mean, obcviously as a fellow, singaporean, I am happy that he is the first Asian Idol and he made us all proud. It was against all odds. In terms of population, in terms of industry. Come on, all the other 5 countries have their own music industry there and Spore? Hm... let's juz say, there's no way to compare.



However, I do not think that he deserve that win last nite. Y? Simple. No stage presence. An idol should haf dat. One step on stage and he/she is in control n won half the battle. An idol should be able to capture dat sense. Bt Hady din haf dis quality. N from wat I heard, his performance was quite shaky too. Bt I saw the duet wif Jac and I must agree that the both of them rocked the place. Bt overall, I din expect him to win. I think no one did. Even himself. Look at his reaction. Let's juz say the 1 vote, 2 countries really worked for him. Dat way, he kinda automatically gets votes from 3 countries - Spore, Msia, Indo.



Watever it is, Congrats Hady, N please please please, live up to your title, n prove the rest wrong. Its a heavy responsibility, bt u gotta do it. Congrats and man oh man, u r one extremely lucky bugger!

Talking about lucky...

U noe i've nvr been lucky... if anything, I'm always down on my luck. Serious! I've been told myself!
And this time, I think I did it again!
Really!
I have officially jinx myself!
Damn. Shit.Mampoz!

Can i un-jinx myself? Re-do things? Please please please...

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 1:58 PM

Thursday, December 13, 2007

*Sleep-SMS-ing*

You heard abt sleep walking rite?
Ges wat?
I've found a new 'sleeping disorder'!
It's wat I called Sleep - SMSing!!!
N who was the first victim of this disorder?
Yours truly of coz!

CASE NO: 0001
PATIENT: NURASHIKIN MOHAMAD
BACKGROUND: Patient has been dreaming abt Jonet lately.Ok, not dreaming, juz keep tinking abt him. Patient has also been contemplating on asking him out.
Patient has sleeping disorder - insomnia. Friends tend to keep sms-ing her at nite. Patient decides to hold hp on her hands while asleep.
EVENT: Receive text from Jonet at 1.42am. 3/4 asleep. Din read properly. Ignored msg. Next day, morning, patient wanted to delete msgs in inbox as inbox is full. Realise msg from Jonet. It reads: " Haha. Sorry2 lambat reply. Goodnight to you too."

Patient got shocked as she cannot recall anything. She cant even remember her texting Jonet. And she wonders what she said to him as he said "haha." And patient starts wondering if she replied that msg. Patient is praying that she din say anything stupid to Jonet while unconscious.

CONCLUSION: TU LAH, KALAU DH TAU ADA PENYAKIT ANGAU N KUAT BERANGAN, SIAPA SURUH TIDO NGAN HP KAT TANGAN! MMG PADANLAH MUKA KAU KIN!!!!

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

WAT HAVE I DONE????????

OK2, before anyone panic for me (i highly doubt so!), ok2, before anyone laughs at my stupidity (this, i highly think so!), it isnt dat bad....
I mean, yes, its bad in the sense i haf no freaking idea wat is said to him, n i hope its nuthing stupid or idiotic like, telling him stuffs. SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!!!
BT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bad things mite happen to clumsy and bad-luck ppl,
bt good tings do happen to gd ppl. (*hint*hint*)

Last nite, while I was still thinking of him and very much contemplating on asking him out, at ard 12.12am, he text me. But of coz, the fon is nt in my hands, i've learnt my lesson. While sleepily opening the msg, n saw his name thr, i became fresh awake! (but of coz!!!) the msg reads: "How are you kin? Sorry ya. I'm quite busy lately. Plus it is my exam week now."

Oh boy..... I was in cloud 9 times infinity. It was nuthing big, I know. Bt really, it was the thought that counts. I mean, here I haf Mr Mat Sensitip, who almost nvr call or text me, damn, he hardly ever reply my texts, or calls, n all this coming from a guy who wants me.

N then on the other hand, Jonet, is nt my anything. I wun even regard us as friends, really. I regard him as sum1 i know (n happen to haf a huge crush on! ;p) n yet, out of the blue, he nvr fails to surprise me by an sms asking me how m i. Look at the text above, see:

1) He asked me how m i
2) He apologized (for i dunno wat actually)
3) He explained (still dunno y)

I mean, come on lah, how m i nt suppose to swoon over dat man! I mean really, that's so thoughtful of him, I mean he actually bothered! Nuthing big, bt he bothered. N i was talking to yani abt this n she also agreed with me. I mean, we both do not know this guy and who he really is, bt so far.... lemme say this.... so goooooddddddddd....

N u noe how i m paranoid rite...? So yani was saying that, a guy usually dun do this kinda ting, if he is nt interested at all. Wic I agree. Of coz. Bt I din want to look like minah perasan kan? Well, i hope so yani, i really hope so.

So peeps, everybody, put ur hands together and pray hard for me. For this. For every1 who did it, thank you very much.

Jonet, jonet, u r definitely sweeping me of my feet...
(gd luck and all the best for the exams!!!

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 10:35 AM

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

BFF

I've got a feeling this will be a super long entry.
BFF - BEST FRIENDS FOREVER...
Sumting that i've always wanted to have.
Sumting that i've always tot i have, till recently.

For those who read my earlier posts, u will notice that i mentioned an ex-bestfren. N i did say that its a long story n i will story it here later. Well, it really is a long story, and no, I'm nt going to story it yet. I dunno if i will ever do it, bt here's a simple short summary.

Her name is Natasha. I used to call her Sharifah Weirdo Natasha Sheikh Al-Osman Kapoor.
We met in 2000. Became close n then inseparable by 2001. We were like the twins. Always together. If u saw me, u will see her. And vice versa. It comes to a point that if sumbody only sees one of us, the immediate reaction is "whr's the other half? gaduh eh?"

We were tight. We had a special bond. We had the same frequency. We had same relationship probs. We were alike in so many ways. I guess that was our downfall. Y? Coz we were both stubborn and egoistic. She's more egoistic, while i was more stubborn. Dats wat u get for an aries-virgo combi.

For the past 2 years, our relationship was on the rocks. It was shaky. Very shaky. It was on-off and the on-off again. Bt the peak was apr this year. After dat, we weren't talking to each other. Literally. It was triggered by a bastard called her bf.

Actually, i've long kept wat i really feel abt the person she is whenever she has a bf. I was so hurt by her actions towards me. Bt I thought, juz be patient and ignore. Bt today, came the day, when i said wat i haf to say, for if i keep it, i shall most probly have to hold my peace forever. I had to let it out, nt to purposely blast her, bt to make her realise wat happen. I tink she needs that mirror, and who else cld have done a better job other than the 'bestfren'.

Below is the conversation we had just now:

EmiLy says:
hey sweets.. just saying a quick hello.. hope you are doin fine and all is well.. have a great week.. take care now..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
honestlt, i m surprised u said hi

EmiLy says:
well.. i just wanted to.. tt's all..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
so wen u went missing all this while... its simply coz u just wanted to?

EmiLy says:
not really.. just had to.. not proud of it and no excuse for it.. i just had to cos not v good moments in my life at the point.. save for work..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
oh really? i ges it works out well for every other fren of urs bt juz nt me rite nat?
sumtimes i wonder wat i m to u
i tot wat we had was it
i tot we were gd
i tot we were best of frens nat
bt look wat happen now
look wat is happening now

EmiLy says:
kin, no one had it good with me.. i dont expect u to believe me but its true..
i didnt get to do a lot of things with u.. i couldn't do much whenever there is a plan with u.. and i felt bad and guilty.. and u got upset everytime..
so i didnt want that to happen anymore.. i know it's not a gd enuff reason but tt's how i felt everytime i cant go to whatever function u had, or teman u wherever u wanted to go and when u needed me..

50 Faces Of Me" says:
so u juz decided to drop it n leave it like dat
u noe y i got upset nat?
i was very understanding
bt i cldnt take it if u kip cancelling it till the very last min
every time it was like dat
n u were always uncontactable
den suddenly out of the blue u will text me n say "sorry sumting wrong wif fon, cnt make it today"
its nt like u dun haf my number to call me nat
n y cnt there be a follow up ?
y cnt u juz contact me later
n say
hey kin i noe i'm bz n all
wanna go out?
or like wat u did juz now
say hi
cnt u juz do that
i'm nt dead u noe nat

EmiLy says:
i know u're not..
i'm not even gonna try to explain myself cos it's true.. i cld've done all those things.. but i didnt..
im not trying to say anything.. but partly, sometimes, it just ain't fair tt its on me at times.. maybe it's just me, it's my own doin i guess..
u disappeared too.. on occassions.. and came back after a long while.. w/o any reasons at all..
but hey.. tt's just it i guess.. im sure u had ur reasons.. i dont even hafta know.. but it's all on me now.. u don't even hafta do anything just cos i said hi..
i've hurt u enough rite.. its just my time i supposed.. to be doin what i did. it's too late to apologise.. at the time i believed that i didnt do anything wrong.. im just sorry it took me so long to do this

50 Faces Of Me" says:
u noe y disappeared nat?
cn u recall how many times u did this to me?
lemme tell u
lemme refresh ur memory
everytime u haf a bf
u will do this missing in action tingy
i m hurt all this whi;e
coz i noe long ago
dat u came back only wen u start having probs
it was same wif razil
izuan
n wan for the first part
everytime u did it
i went
oh nvm
i dun wanna disturb her new rlntship
bt still hoping u will cntct me
n den wen i juz missed u so much
i tot
blah!
juz call her
so dats wen i reappear like wat u said
bt i did that one too many times natasha
i feel like i'm second class to u
juz sum1 who u'd run to wen u haf dat no one
i dun expect u to be there wif me 24/7
u wanna talk bz?
all of us r
at sum point in life
we'll fade away
bt i dun expect u to disappear 100% nat
ur rltnship wif wan itself
brapa byk kali u disappear nat?
3 kali!
n yes i counted
coz u meant dat much to me
n tell u the truth
i missed u like hell nat!
bt i was soooooooooooooo fucking hurt on wat u did
it took me sumtime to set aside my ego n ask u out a few times before.
coz i tot, buat apa nk besar2 kan perkara kecik
u r my fren aft all
u r wat i tot my best fren aft all
bt this time nat,
i need to protect myself
i cnt kip doing wat i did
how many of my msgs din u reply?
u cld haf sent me a fwded msg if u were too damn bz
u noe y i stop even msging u aft a while?
coz i noe it wldnt matter to u at all
on my bdae
i waited for ur simple "hepi bdae"
bt no
i din get it
on my sister's wedding
u noe how much i bloody contemplate on sending dat card
i did.
coz i still wanted u to be there, against all odds

EmiLy says:
omg kin.. i swear to u... i text u on ur bdae
how cld i forget!

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i knew u were bz
n u were werking shifts
bt i was at least waiting for that sms
wic says
kin i cnt make it

EmiLy says:
and i did text u on ur sister's wedding day i cldnt come!

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
bt no
su had to call u in front of me to ask

EmiLy says:
dammit..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i was hurt nat
i was freaking hurt

EmiLy says:
i did text u kin..
god forbid.. i did
i swear.. i did
esp on ur bdae.. i did text.. i wld've never forgotten.. ever..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i noe u wld nvr forget
dats y it hurt more

EmiLy says:
i know what i did.. everytime.. it's too late..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
"she remmbers n yet she din bother"

EmiLy says:
but with wan.. i did realise it too late for my own good..
tts y partly.. i didnt wanna come running to u whenever shit happened.. u were the only person i wanted to run to but i didnt cos i know what i did.. and it's been big of u to be there for me everytime i did that

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
so y cnt u run to me n xplain u realise wat u did??????
i wld haf forgive u

EmiLy says:
and so i figured.. tt u're better off not having me to do that to u..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i waited for u to run to me nat, as odd as it seems!

EmiLy says:
i cant kin.. i cant.. being me.. the egoistic bitch tt i am.. i cldnt afford to run to u..
i was just too scared to do that.. and without knowing it do it again..
so i didnt go to u.. nor anyone.. for that matter..
u matter to me.. as much as i do to u.. still do.. too many times i wanted to say hi.. too may times i wanted to say more than just hi.. esp when u text me abt the card.. but didnt.. just couldn;t..
and now.. it wasnt cos of anything tt i said hi.. i purely wanted to say hi..
im not even expecting u to reply.. or do anything..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
wen u text me at facebook
i tot i wanted to say it all then
bt i really wanted u to be at the wedding
so i kept quiet
bt now
today
i tot this is it
coz u mite disappear again aft dat hi
n god noes wen will i ever c u again
n lose my chnace
dun see this as me blasting u
the way i see it
i'm juz expressing myself
i need to do it

EmiLy says:
i know..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
coz i've had enuff of surpressed n bottled feelings
i'm going crazy by the day

EmiLy says:
of all ppl.. i wanted it to come from u

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
so this is it

EmiLy says:
and i appreciate it... cos i've never really gotten tt from u... and im glad u did expressed it
i know u didnt even hafta do this.. u cld've just not say anything..
i just thot i owed that much to u..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
honestly, i was hurt wen i saw ur pics at frenster
its like u easily moved on
its like u were always too bz for me
n nt for the rest
dat hurt a lot too
after a while i juz accepted
dat watever we had is ruined
wen i saw our pics together
esp those kl trips
my heart ache so much
there were many a time wen i tot i needed to come face to face

EmiLy says:
kin... i never moved on..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
n ask u point blank wat happen to us?
i still cnt believe i was dumped by my bestfren for another guy
dats wat i'm worth i ges
dats my worth

EmiLy says:
i didnt dump u....... pls dont think tt
u're worth more.... i made u think that didnt i.. and u know what i thot evrytime? you can do much better than me..
a person much better than me.. who wldnt treat u like this

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i tot i finally found dat sum1 i cn call bestfren for the rest of my life
i tot i finally haf dat permanent sum1 who will be wif me watever happens in my life
well i tot wrong
the CVs may be my fav genk
bt i cnt say any1 of dem inparticular as my best fren
they'r the best genk
my closest fren who loves me deep
bt none had wat we had
bt i'm going to give it to u
thank you for showing me
thank u for making me stronger
wen u left i found myself learning to survive on my own
wasnt easy
bt at least i did
now i noe in life
u only haf urself
thank you for teaching me dat
thank you

EmiLy says:
i dunno what to say to that.. not gonna say anything even.. but i thank u for giving me this much.. to let me know.. i dont know what else to say to u kin..
i've no right to even say anything
for what it's worth, no how small it seems, i am sorry.. for everything.. and i mean everything.. from day 1 i got to know u, till now..
from what i can see.. correct me if im wrong, life's been good for u.. and im glad..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
li'm still trying to survive
i'm still trying to figure
i've had enuff
bt pretences is all i cn afford rite now
just so u noe

EmiLy says:
abt us.. you dont' hafta pretend.. cos now i know.. even if not all, at least a little.. you dont have to befriend me again or pretend to like me still.. u do what u feel like doin.. as u shld..

50 Faces Of Me" says:
the trouble is i always feel like forgiving u n forgetting watever happen

EmiLy says:
u dont have to

50 Faces Of Me" says:
the prob is i always want u to be my friend again
the truth is i've always still regard u as my bestfren, no matter how many times i called u my ex-bestfren
i dun need to pretend nat
i like u still like before
i juz hate the way u handle tings
i juz hate the way u r n the person u become wenever u haf a bf
i ges dats y i like zahri a lot
oz wen u were him

EmiLy says:
i now know..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
u were still the same person
he was the only person who had dat effect on u
n as muc as i always want u to see happy
i hope u r no longer wif dat bastard
he was the ultimate trigger of wat is happening to us

EmiLy says:
u talking abt wan?
or zahri..?

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
wan of coz
maybe u din noe
bt let me tell u

EmiLy says:
cos for what's its worth...

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
there were a few times

EmiLy says:
i dotn care for both anymore

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
wen he was with you
n den he saw me
he juz brought u further away
i hate him
i still do

EmiLy says:
i don't blame u..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
such a bastard

EmiLy says:
well like i said, for what its worth... u can hate him all u want..

50 Faces Of Me" says:
tell me u r no longer wif him

EmiLy says:
he is one...
im not...
i broke it off...

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
gd for you.
i've nvr seen a bigger bastard den dat

EmiLy says:
u've always known what's gd for me huh kin...
and still im such a jerk
tts y when shit happened, i didnt wanna come to u.. cos it's gonna be the same thing i did everytime..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
if i'd known, i'd warned u way earlier... bt no.. i suported u at the start... bt din noe he can turn into suc a big bastard

EmiLy says:
all tt u just mentioned..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
who does he tink he is pulling u away from me like dat!
bt werent u still wif me during fasting mth

EmiLy says:
i was? no rite?
cos at the point.. i know i disappeared from everyone

50 Faces Of Me" says:
wif him i mean
coz nad saw u wif a guy
i was thr bt din c u
n apparently dat guy saw us
n he juz walked away
i tot mus be dat bitch
n frm far looks a bit like him

EmiLy says:
yes.. i was still with him.. all the way till raya.. until early this yr.. i found out tt he lied to me and i didnt reali trust him anymore.. i went on a lot of time off.. i disappeared from him..
everytime it's the same thing.. till i finally broke it off proper in aug..
during the whole year i was such in a daze.. didnt really contacted anyone.. not even u kin.. i was having lotsa flashbacks on myself and whatever i'd done..
didnt talk to anyone abt what was goin wth him or with me.. til i decided on my own

50 Faces Of Me" says:
bt dis fasting mth yg br lepas in sept tau

EmiLy says:
oh no...
i wasnt with him this yr
broke off in aug..
before fasting mth.. i was no longer with him..
prolly u guys saw him but with another person.. i dunno

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
nad saw u
din noe the guy
bt frm far the guy loks like him

EmiLy says:
where was this?

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
bt both of u walking nt dat close to each other
geylang
tanjong katong complex carpark area

EmiLy says:
was he waring glasses?

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
rite aft the jejatas
dunno cnt c
dark at nite
jus make out from physical n cara jln

EmiLy says:
the only person i went to geylang with .. and at the location u mentioned.. must've been with my close guy fren from work
he's the only one i went to geylang with.. that one time only.
but his built is bigger than wan's and taller.. with glasses..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
mayb dats him

EmiLy says:
this..
talking to u in away
* a way

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
damn the window got close i din ne wat u said earlier aft i said do wat?

EmiLy says:
lettime talk to u.. in a way
*letting me

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
oh...
i m glad we did dis too nat
honestly
i ges the air is cleared now
at least sum of it

EmiLy says:
if there's more we shld prolly clear it soon
i guess so...
anyhow.. i have to leave u now.. need to get to work..
if there's more kin.. issues i mean.. u can clear it up with me..
i wld like tt.. to listen.. i havent been doin much of that have i..

50 Faces Of Me" says:
i ges
i tink the impt ones r out
aniwei
juz in case u dun haf my number
9******* (sorry nt for publishing purpose)

EmiLy says:
i do have ur number

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
u noe u cn still call me
it'll be awkward
"50 Faces Of Me" says:
bt
i dunno

EmiLy says:
both in fact.. even if u dont use the other one

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
lets see how it goes

EmiLy says:
i know... it's not my place to say this.. but.. u can do the same.. if u wanted to that is.. its not rite for me to say it..
yeah, we'll see how it goes..

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
i hope u contact me
i tink we need to sit down n talk
gosh dis feel likes a couple breaking up

EmiLy says:
aha.. feels like tt too...
yeah, we'll do that.. sit down and talk..
in the meantime.. u take care now..
speak soon..
thanks kin...

"50 Faces Of Me" says:
thanks to u too for allowing me to express myself
u take care too

So that was it. Honestly, I dunno if we'll ever contact each other again. Or sit down and talk like we are supposed to. Let's just see. Let's just wait and see.

BFF???
*hah*

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 3:21 PM

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

*SALAM JAUH*

Hey su!!!!
Welcome to my blog!!!!!

Missing u dearly n cnt wait for nxt week!

Happy revamping ur blog k!

Love,
Shikin

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 12:39 PM

Monday, December 10, 2007

*phew*

Alhamdulillah...
I tink SEM is over. Finally!
The reason i wrote 'tink' is simple. Usually wen i believe it's over, it's nt. So let's nt get our hopes too high n settle comfortably with 'tink'. Anyway, it should be over as today is the deadline. But noeing a few tings.... hmm... i doubt dat'll be the last of dat 3-letter word.

Alhamdulillah....
I saw the pay slip for this mth. The long-awaited moment aft more den 24 yrs of life. I finally see the amount for a year-end bonus. After 3 yrs of toiling n getting paid as a temp staff n treated like 2nd class, I finally get to see it. Well, it came after almost another yr of toiling. Come 2 more days, I will be able to taste it. Unfortunately, I noe, $2.5k will haf to go to the sch fees. Another huge percentage of it will go to VS. ;p
Wat cn I say?
I'm a sucker for all tings beautiful n sexy!

Anyway, after more den 3 wks, I saw Roydi!
He looks the same of coz.
Bt he had the cheek to say "asal muka u mcm muka tua?"
KURENG ASEM TUL!
I kept quiet.
There's no need to explain the process of 'natural peeling'
Damn the peeling. Everytime I do my peeling, its the wrong time!
Anyway, look ugly now, better later, its quite worth it.
Surprised dat he came to see me. (simply coz i noe he din c me the other time he came. idiot!)
Bt he'd better man! Kalu tk tgk, siap ah!
*Action Jer Tu...*

I got a funny daily zodiac reading juz now. Funny coz its true. Shld I heed the advice? N to whom is it referring to?

Dilemma. Questions.
Questions. Dilemma.

*phew*

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 5:21 PM

Thursday, December 06, 2007

That Sweet Escape...

I'm tired.... as always u may say...
the difference is...
this time i'm really tired....
as in really...
really tired...

i m physically tired, mentally drained...
i m so exhausted
dat i tink i m now using my backup emergency batt to move on...

i still haveng got the rest i deserve from the wedding..
imagine, the wedding is like over almost 3 weeks..
n here i m... still craving that rest i so deserved..
imagine, i havent rest since pre-wedding days...
3 weeks now...
n i've been bringing werk hm from dat time.

werk. hm.
unlike me yeah.
i've nvr seen myself so hardwerking n responsible.
bt i dun haf a choice.
many a times wen i'm tempted to bring werk hm before,
i told myself, 'no!'
coz i know dat once i start, i wun stop.

n now it had to happen. i had to bring werk hm coz of stupid deadlines. i was so desperate dat 2 days ago i actually loaned out the sch's tablet so dat i cn werk at hm...
my life after werk consists of me bathing, eating den cont werking till midnite.
den i'll be too tired to sleep.
so i'l read.
den i'll go to bed at ard 2.
n den wake up in thewee hrs,anxious n tinking abt werk.
my mind is filled with thinking..
"ok, tmr, wen i get into the ofis, i'll do this den that, den i'll clear this, n oh ya, dun forget dat, n wat more did i miss..."
dat will go on till 4.30.
den i doze off again..
n wake up at 5.30...again... den anxiously counting the time...
"1h more to go, b4 werk starts!"
my brain wld say.

n den the alarm rings..
n off i go, start my day,
feeling more tired, as the day passes by.

after a mth of going tru this routine,
i had an almost breakdown period at werk juz now.
Y?
coz i m damn tired of seeing the same old report, playing ping pong with me.
n den i haf to rush for deadlines. sumting dat is due on mon, haf to be finished on thurs for the simple reason of i wun b in the ofis on fri.

n the report is nvr ending, n ppl kip making mistakes n thus the ping pong game.

in the middle of me trying to stay calm, meeting the deadlines, stressed out over the deadlines n reports, pissed that i'm doing sum1 else's job, trying hard to control nt to curse out loud,
i had to run ard doing other tings.other mediocre tings that cld n shld be done by others who obviously is nt doing the report.
bt instead, who had to do it. me.
n i had to do it thrice. talking abt waste of time.
i had to look for envelopes, files,entertain walk in, answer phones, all of this dat cld be handled by other 'experienced professionals' bt instead, passed over to a young newbie like me.
where is the fairness?

i m rushing for a god-damned report people! get that in your freaking heads!

n in that business, i forgot to raise n ITQ.sumting wic is impt coz i need the VP to approve first b4 he leaves, n he is leaving realllllll soon. i'm dead. see, i'm sill worried abt werk. wat m i?
a werkaholic now? eeeeeeeeeeeee! gross!

my body is aching so bad, dat its numb.
my head feels heavy.
i dun tink i cn bring myself to another day of this.
no wonder i cnt wait for that trip.
trip to KL sounds excellent now, wen i tink abt it, n compare it to now.
i cnt wait for that sweet escape!

on a lighter note,
guess who called me juz now?
not jonet! i wished!
roydi.
truth is, i'm surprised.
bt it's gd to hear from him.
other than dat.
i'm keeping mum.
till further notice.

gtg, i wanna go sleep...

*yeah rite!*

fine, i'll go read myself till i sleep..
ciao!

Posted by DiStUrBeD AnGeL at 11:00 PM